By single I definitely don't mean your relationship status. The fact that you live singularly, take independent decisions, and face the brunt of them too!
Hi, my name is Ritviza and I'm the founder of my safe space, my cute little clothing brand called Minimul. I started Minimul in extremely high spirits, in my late 20s, with an everlasting impression that this business will become the sole purpose of my life, and I necessarily don't need anything or anyone. Rightfully so, I thoroughly enjoyed my first 3 years of raising Minimul to a 6 figure yielding business, giving not only me the purpose but also to my team of 5 people, who are now family!
Along the way I realised a lot of things, A LOT! Trust you me, I wouldn't have, if i wasn't a woman in business.
1. Business asks of us to decisive, tough, confident- all the right qualities to imbibe as a human. The thing about adapting new qualities is you must undo the existing contradicting ones. So if as a woman you're gentle, have hard time confronting and negotiating, and would spend a dime extra for comfort, then the "woman" and "woman in business" are in clash. This was fairly easy for me to do as I have been a boarding school product from the start, so being tough was one of my major kicks!
2. Until you turn 30! These jokes and banters you see online about turning old when you turn 30- don't take them lightly. The first signs of "age" are not physically visible, but they will reflect mentally and emotionally. If you thought you're a tough cookie, wait until the 30s where absence of somebody's assistance, opinions and mere presence will make you shed a tear or two.
3. Now lets talk about being single here- again not relationship wise! Living alone sure makes you more "independent" but it also makes you more vulnerable. Vulnerable to all the things and feelings that have led you here. Your choicest decisions can trigger you sometimes, or slow you down, trigger would be a rather strong word! And as humans, love and validation and being belonged is all that we seek. More than roti, kapda aur makaan!
So now when you're in your peak 30s, building and trembling, figuring out this new person inside of you, who refuses to obey, alongside running this simple strategic business which only asks of you to be SANE AND STABLE!, can you do that? Your mind says- sure I've been that all my life, but your heart and the limbic system refuse to agree!
4. Embrace softness- I believe the reason we don't often see to many women in roles of power is because it contradicts with their innate being at some point in life. We are like shooting stars in our 20s (and maybe in our 40s too, after the storm has settled), but in our 30s, as I speak for myself, living alone, being child free by choice, and financially independent may seem like adverse decisions.
My two cents- please stay put. Years of you made a choice to take on this challenging yet extremely rewarding life, and the future you will also thank you for it. Essentially because that's who you are! That's who I am. We seldom see people taking and sustaining extreme decisions, so if you did, something in you asked for it.
Own your life and work, your womanhood, your down months when you have to really budget, but also your peak ones where you save and invest. Manifest flourishing and strength, embrace challenges, but stay at it.
In no time you will realise, you'd have become the woman, your inner child idealised. Dressing pretty, working out, running a successful business, crying but also laughing unapologetically.
More on this the next time,
Love,
Ritviza